Buah hati mama-cayang mama bucuk macam
Firstly, i would like to share that it's not easy to raise a baby/child/toddler.I just don't think that there is a mother who has no problem at all in raising her child. of course, the challenges will be different. As in my case, hmm..lets do some flashbacks on Fahri's progression:
Fahri- During Pregnancy
The day that i knew i was conceived was at 5-week of pregnancy. My hubby and I could not describe how happy we were on that time. Alhamdulillah...Allah S.W.T. gave us the opportunity and the
rezeki. That was after one month of marriage. It was quite soon and I am blessed. Both of us always wanted a baby. We went to several clinics and met few gynae to double-check on it.
When my pregnancy reached 7 weeks (almost 2 months), i started to have all-day sickness, nausea. It lasted till i was 4-month. It was really bad.I almost laid down on my bed every day during that period.i couldn't get up from bed or else, i would be vomiting every single thing from my stomach.And even helpless, my routine on that time was only waiting for the signal to vomit. I couldn't have the energy to go to toilet and wash myself! Just imagine how my hubby felt at that time! but i am sure he understood my situation and condition. My work? Countless MCs and Emergency Leaves that i have applied. My classes? I am sure some students wished they were not in my class on that time due to the commitment that i couldn't give. But, of course, most of them understood my situation. Even it is more dangerous because i drive to work alone from Klang to Shah Alam and morning sickness attacked me almost every single morning...I used to vomit in my car, on my clothes, on the steering when the nausea attacked me without any signs. If i was lucky enough, i managed to grab some plastic bags for me to throw in.
At 5-month of pregnancy and onwards, i was getting better and better. Everything back to normal and pregnancy became one of the most wonderful miracles happened to me.All of us couldn't wait to see our first child.
On Labour
Alhamdulillah, i would say my labour experience was not as challenging as other women. I have a one hour pain of contraction before Fahri was born into this world. And he is the most charming baby ever!
During Confinement (45 days)
On the third day after he was born, he was affected by jaundice. I felt bad because I could not produce my milk on the first day he was born and people said it was the reason why he was affected. He was admitted back in the same polyclinic for one and a half day. Only God knows how miserable I was on that time. I couldn't stop crying thinking how he was in the hospital without me by his side as I have been advised just to get rest at home. The jaundice temperature was quite high. Once he was discharged from hospital, we tried so many ways to reduce or to cure the jaundice but it lasted quite long till he reached one month old. My milk supplement was flowing richly and I was so happy breastfeeding him on that time. The only thing that i regret was i did not really pay attention on the importance of breast pumping on that time. I was focusing more on direct breastfeeding.
On the other note, Fahri was not that easy to be soothed of. From day one he was born, he would cry and cranky most of the times. And even worse, he were screaming from all night long..and at times he stopped till dawn.
I started working (Fahri was 2-month old)
Like I said, he is a cry-baby. He would cry almost every day. Every night. I was not sure what was the problem. Like usual, people will say he might having kembung perut. Thus, there is no such thing as 'sleeping beauty' since the day he was born. Sometimes, it was really testing your patience as a zero-experienced mother. So, it lasted till he was 6 months (even until now but not as frequent as before).
On my breastfeeding issue, as i was not pumping my milk during confinement, i guess my milk supplement has decreased and i was out of stock of BF milk. My milk flow has completely stopped when Fahri reached 3 months.i felt so guilty. but life must goes on and the lesson learnt. Thus, to make sure that Fahri gets the best nutrition, i have to feed him a formula milk, Enfalac A+. The brand costs us an arm and a leg! We have to buy 5 to 6 packs of Enfalac A+ for a month. But it's ok..as long as he gets the best out of it.
On his cranky-ness
Like i said, Fahri has this mood-swing. He will easily get bored of things and get cranky. Most of the times, untill now, it is quite hard for him to get a peaceful sleep. He will get cranky in the middle of the night. And if he wanted something, he wanted it quick! For example, he wanted milk and if we were late giving him milk...he will scream and crying and then refuse to drink the milk..then we have to calm him...but it's very difficult to calm him down. At times, he would not want anything. Cradle, hugging, milk, changing diapers would not work! so, we have just to bare with that condition for half an hour to one hour. Or even in a car! Sometimes, he will just throw his tantrum out of nowhere. The conclusion is, it is quite difficult to pujuk him once he get cranky! And one more thing that i noticed recently is he can't stay in one house for a long duration..because we used to bring him out every day..so maybe he wanted to go out every day or else he will get cranky. I did cry few times when I was helpless, didn't know what to do to calm him down when he cried and screamed all over the way..and did not want to stop..
Fahri's slim body
Fahri is not a baby who has this chubby cheek and plum arms or legs. He is a small size and slim baby. He weighed at 3kg when he was born. And of course his weight is increasing monthly but it's not that impressive. He did not drink that much milk since he was born. He would stop when he thinks he had enough. He is not a baby who will drink numbers of ounces each time he's been fed. We can't force him to drink more if he doesn't want to. But of course, he drinks enough..but not as much as other babies at his age. Now, as he already been introduced to weaning/ solid food..same thing happened. He will just eat if he wants too. Don't force him. Of course, we have to be very patient to pujuk him to eat...have to follow and chase him for almost one hour to feed him with a small bowl of porridge or puree! That's Fahri. His toys or his business are more important than the food! Recently, i noticed that he loves bread more than porridge. But..i believe, porridge will give him more balanced nutrition than the bread does. Now, at 11-month-old, he just weigh at 8 kg..
On his development
Reaching one year old very soon, he still couldn't walk. But he manages to climb chairs or tables and stand. I would say he is quite slow in terms of movement development. He also just have one tooth compared to other kids at his age who have 4 to 8 teeth.
After all.....
He is still my Fahri. my son. remember, how excited my hubby and I were when we get to know that i was pregnant? We should bare with him..his behavior, his cranky, his tantrum, his slimness. He is my baby. my kid. I don't care if he is not as chubby or plum as other people's kids. I don't care if he throws his tantrum for hours non stop. I don't care if i have to be awake all night long and could not sleep to hug him. I don't care if i have to spend more than what i can earn to pay his medical bills and buy his milk and pampers. I don't care if his progression is not as fast as other kids. All I care is...I want him to be as healthy as possible, active, smart, kind, and anak yang soleh. And one thing for sure that i know and care is...he is one kind-hearted kid. And I am sure he is more than that. InsyaAllah...
Fahri, you're turning ONE very very soon. Mama doesn't care what people say about u. In fact, you are my sweet-heart, my life. Mama will try to improve the motherhood/ parenthood skill as mama is still learning. Mama loves u so much.Full stop.