Wednesday, August 16, 2017

Raising our little khalifah(s)

Throughout the week, Fahri is having his monthly test in his religious school. And last night, I sat down with him to revise Tauhid subject for tomorrow's test. Naeem as usual, love to give us a company. I revised the topics of 'Rukun Islam' and 'Rukun Iman' with Fahri. Alhamdulillah, he managed to memorized all of the five pillars of Islam and six pillars of Imaan. However, I was wondering, does he really understand the meaning of each pillar that he has memorized. I did some tests and yes, they do not really have a clear picture what are the meaning of those pillars. Then, I started to describe all those related to faith, Allah, shahadah and so on. At certain points, I had to put my description on a piece paper. My two boys with totally different personality. Fahri will listen but not really focus but i guess he already had a background knowledge on what I was trying to describe. While Naeem, he is a very sensitive boy to the extend he cried when I talked about akhirah (hereafter). Now, I have this question in mind;

How to make the kids love listen to akhirah story and not feeling scared about it?

Because, after all that is the meaning of the 5th pillar of iman.

Thus, I guess the way we up bring our children is very crucial and are we on the right track, parents?
I am no perfect Muslim parents as well, but I guess and I have found this article from here which i believe will benefit all of the Muslim parents in shaa Allah. I will highlight some of the powerful thoughts from the article.

Successful Strategies to raise children in Islam:

1. Pray / Dua

“Every success I have seen in my family’s life, I can remember having prayed for it first,” admits one grandmother of three huffadh (memorizers of Quran). “If my dua doesn’t come true in this world, I have faith that it will in the next one, so I have patience.”
 “I recited Surah Maryam every single day of my pregnancy. I want pious children above all else — it’s all that matters.”
Many families shared with me their reliance on Salaat-ul-Istikhaara (Prayer for Guidance) before making any major life-altering decisions and Salaat-ul-Haajah (Prayer for Need) when desiring something they felt was crucial for their children’s well-being. Whenever a blessing appeared in their lives, they were quick to pray Salaat-ul-Shukr (Prayer of Gratitude) as well.
2.  Suhba (companionship) will make you or break you.
“It doesn’t necessarily need to be that it’s the ‘drinking, gambling, partying crowd’ that is holding you back,” muses a mother of elementary school children upon hearing the couple’s history. “I have one set of ‘dinner party friends’ who believe in a ‘children should be seen and not heard’ philosophy. They plant the kids around TV sets and video games while the parents socialize in other rooms. Then I have another group of friends who engage their children in the adult conversations, who don’t keep the younger ones ‘out of sight, out of mind’. It might surprise you to learn that my own kids actually prefer to be around the adults who actually care enough to get to know them.”
3. The Prophet (salallaahu alaihi wasallam) was a living, breathing reality in our lives.
When a learned scholar was recently asked, “What should we teach our children?”, his response was swift and unequivocal — “The seerah (biography of the Prophet) and nasheeds (devotional songs of praise). If your kids love the Prophet, they will automatically love Allah.”
With toddlers and pre-schoolers, I noticed that a lot of the parents mentioned the Prophet Muhammad (salallaahu alaihi wasallam) as if he were a relevant person in their lives. They talked about him the way one would talk about any respected elder whom the child adored. It wasn’t unusual to hear parents telling their little ones, “The Prophet Muhammad (salallaahu alaihi wasallam) loved green, so let’s wear our green clothes for Friday Prayer!” or “Prophet Muhammad (salallaahu alaihi wasallam) taught us that we should sit down when we get angry, so let’s sit down since you’re feeling so frustrated.”
While visiting my sister in Southern California one weekend, I noticed that an English translation of Imam Tirmidhi’s “Shama’il” (Characteristics) sat on my six-year-old nephew’s beside table. She explained that it was part of their son’s bedtime ritual for her husband to share one hadith from that famous ninth century text with him. “Learning intimate details, like the fact the Prophet (salallaahu alaihi wasallam) enjoyed eating dates with cucumbers, makes our son feel like he actually personally knows the Prophet (salallaahu alaihi wasallam).”
4.  Having fun wasn’t “haraam” in our home, but we kept the home environment as pure as possible.
“If Shaytan (Satan) were to ring our doorbell and ask if he could come in and babysit our children, we would throw him out,” one scholar says, “yet we allow the television set to do exactly that…we literally invite Shaytan in when we turn the TV on!”
“Preserving my children’s fitra (primordial state) is of the highest priority to us,” one mother of two pre-schoolers tells me. “Right now, the difference between right and wrong is so clear in their eyes; they really get it when we explain what’s what to them. The entertainment industry’s depiction of what’s ‘normal’ manages to confuse adults, so just imagine what it does to children!”
“It’s important to replace every haraam you stop your child from with at least two halaals they can enjoy,” advises a popular Muslim family counselor. “You don’t want your children to grow up thinking that Islam is just a bunch of no’s — ‘no, you can’t do this; no, you can’t do that.'” She laughs heartily, “Make it about ‘yes, we can!'”“There is so much fitna (tribulation) out there in the world. We can’t protect our kids from everything bad,” warns a devout grandfather of ten children. “But it is for that very reason that the home must be an oasis where Allah is remembered and obeyed, where children can relax and feel cherished, where they can practice their religion without feeling apologetic or alien. The home environment should be as halaal as possible. Our litmus test was always ‘Would we be ashamed if the Prophet (salallaahu alaihi wasallam) were to walk into our house right now? Is there anything we would want to hide?’.”
5. Our parents didn’t just “talk the talk”, they “walked the walk”.
“Children need to see that Islam ‘worked’ in our home,” says another scholar. “Islam isn’t just about praying and fasting and charity. Islam is an attitude that must be infused in the mundane day-to-day dealings with life. Do parents treat each other with respect? How do they react to the ups and downs of life? Do they have a sense of civic responsibility? Children are constantly learning from their parents, even when the parents don’t think they have anything to teach.”
“I don’t get it when I hear mothers telling their kids ‘Don’t tell lies’ and then in the next breath smoothly tell phone callers, ‘Oh, he’s not home right now’ when the husband is sitting right there in front of them,” says a medical school resident who is spending time learning Hanafi fiqh as well. “Or how about when parents teach their kids ‘It’s wrong to backbite’ and then complain about the in-laws to anyone who will listen? 
6. Talk to your kids…with love.
“When your kids are younger, you should take advantage of every opportunity to guide them, remind them, advise them,” instructs an Iraqi father of two girls. “Of course, there’s a fine line between nagging and teaching, between being judgmental and being perceptive. Nevertheless, I encourage my children to look at everything through ‘the eye of discernment’. What does everything around us mean? Why is that billboard saying that their brand of soda will guarantee a successful party? What was the real reason that car driver honked his horn like that? Why does this movie make parents look like bumbling fools? Is having to wait in a long line ever a reason to lose your temper with a bank teller? Talk, talk, talk to your kids! Even if they don’t say anything, believe me, they’re listening!”
7. They had a pious father who engaged them.
A majority of the families I spoke with extolled the virtues of the Amir of the House: the man who led his children in congregational prayer, the father who gently but firmly encouraged both his son’s and his daughter’s sense of modesty, the husband who fulfilled his wife’s rights without demanding his own, the responsible breadwinner, the dad who put a stop to gossip the moment it started, the patriarch who was eager to hasten to the masjid to join the jama’ah (congregation), the Muslim who held fast to his principles (whether it was a father who refused to allow his co-workers to shorten his name from “Mohammad” to “Mo” or the dad who wouldn’t travel on Fridays so that his Jumah prayer wouldn’t be jeopardized). The grown children remember their father’s integrity and quiet examples long after they have entered parenthood on their own, voluntarily choosing to mold their own lives in honor of a man who didn’t force his way of life down their throats when they were younger.

Monday, August 14, 2017

Family Day Al Muhammadi

Assalamualaikum..

We successfully organized our Family Day or known as Al Muhammadi Family Day on the 4th of Syawal. Thank you to my cousin Eli for being the mastermind and handling most of the tasks. He even came out with the plan. It was a really excellent idea to have the event on the 4th day of Syawal since most of the relatives and family members were available. Al Muhammadi is actually a name of our beloved late grandfather- Muhammad, my mom's late father. Al Fatihah. Both my grandparents from mother's side had passed away when I was in secondary school. Al Fatihah to both. My mom had 4 siblings and she is the only lady. She has 2 elder brothers (both had passed away few years back) and one younger brother. In total, Al Muhammadi consists of approximately 50 members including cousins, nieces and nephews, aunties and uncles. Two families could not make it at a very last minute which were my uncle Pak Su's family and my brother's family- both families were not able to attend due to health reasons. Hopefully this is not the last gathering we re gonna have so that all family members could join in future.

The family day took place in Permai Resort, Bachok. This was our first time here. The resort is just nice for a family gathering. There are many activities can be done here. We had a one night stay in the resort. We arrived at 2 pm and checked out the next day at 12 pm.
Just arrived! My boys were handsomely dressed at the beach because we were from a Raya visit before straightaway heading to the resort.
Bumped into Fizo Omar. Coincidentally, he was also having a family day there. My husband dah feeling retis. Please forgive him 😁

So, these were among of the activities held on the first day:
1) Lunch (a very late lunch haha)- We had rice with gulai uhhhh sedapnya with sambal...a great catch up for all the family members since it's very difficult for us to gather like this especially me and my family as I am staying in Klang. Most of them are staying in Kelantan. Few in Kuantan and JB.
2) Get ready for the telematch games. We changed attire, wearing our official Al- Muhammadi Family Day T Shirt...yeayyy
3) Telematch time! Some of the games were:

Kids:
-Candy Flour (blowing flour to find candy)
- Egg and Spoon Race
- Blow and Explode Balloons

Adults games were divided to married couples and singles:


- Egg Toss (the funniest game ever I swear)- The pairs stand about one metre apart, and a raw egg is tossed from one partner to the next.
Those who catch the eggs without breaking them continue in the game, the others are out.
After each successful catch, the players must take one step backward so that the tosses are longer and longer.
- Three Legged Race

with my hmm cousin's daughter...Nurul
Listening to the briefing by my cousin Joe
Look what I managed to snap! Lovebirds were holding hands during briefing session hihi...my mom and dad.. the most senior members
selfie is a must
the kids were ready for the first game, candy flour!
Fahri was excited but Naeem was a lil bit afraid of i-don't-know-what
The daddies were giving some tips to the kids
Yeayyy Fahri won the second place!
with mummy, Kak Lily, Mun, Kak Za, Kak Ma and Damia
My family...how i wish my brother and his family were here. Oh ya my sister also could not make it due to work call.
Naeem with Tok Wan n nenek
The best part was to spend time with them!
Enjoying the beach side after the telematch games
Selfies with my naka2 menakan yang setahun sekali je jumpa...All are grown up, pretty and handsome!
Group photos! It was really fun!
Candid of us discussing on things or maybe reviewing our selfies haha
After the telematch...the gentlemen went to the pool
At night, we had a barbecue
Then, prize giving ceremony
Yeayy..Fahri's name was called for three times..
Dapat snackss yeayyy
The next morning, before checking out, we had breakfast together
My mom and my aunty (my late uncle's wife), among the seniors in the family..


Overall, it was a really successful event and we really need to have this more in future! Well done ❤

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

Raya 2017 Part 2: Kelantan, Kuantan and KL

We safely arrived in Pasir Mas (my cousin's house) around 6 pm on the third day of Syawal. That was my first visit to their house. Actually we stayed over night at the house before heading to Tok Bali for our family day on the next day. Thank you my cousin Kasyfu and wife Kak Na for the hospitality. Such a beautiful house with amazing scenery. My parents also were staying there for one night. Just look at the views. Breathtaking! The bendang and all..
without wasting time, an OOTD is a must! This kurung I bought at a boutique in Plaza Masalam. Very cheap sebab dah last piece hehe
Cantik kan background suasana macam tu...finally dapat beraya with my mom n sis
with my cousin Kak Na and her kids
my pretty sis
Terharu sangat sebab we reached late at 6 pm so open house rumah cousin ni dah nak habis makanan. So my dear cousin Khalilah masuk dapur balik and cooked this ayam masak merah for us...Sedapppp sangat.. Thank you love.. Tak sempat amik gambar sbb dia bz chef
The next day before heading to Tok Bali, sempat kami nak beraya jap dekat rumah my dad's sister dekat Jalan Telipot.
with my darling cousins
with all the cousins and relatives at my aunty's house

Cerita family day nanti kita buat entry special keh..

After family day tu, we straight away went back to Kuantan and stayed one night before heading to KL the next day because my parents wanted to visit their grandson Irfan (my brother's son) who was having Dengue fever at that time. We reached Kuantan around 6 pm and we stooped by at my aunty's house (rumah wajib) to pray and having dinner. Yeayy dapat jumpa cousins lagi. Memang raya sakan Alhamdulillah.
with my pretty cousin Kak Zura
family my aunty...missing one cousin and her family here

the ladies...

The next day... we headed to KL.. went to my brother's house in Sri Damansara and the final pit stop was at my aunty's house in Kota Damansara
Yeayy finally jumpa nasi dagang
Yummy!!!

My darling nephew Irfan..Alhamdulillah he is fully recovered
my two pretty cousins
having dinner at my aunty's house 
Photoshoot wajib 
missing my sister here as she had to work during Raya! 

Raya 2017 Part 1: Ijok, Perak

Assalamualaikum..

One of the best moments from our Raya this year is the fact that the boys began to cooperate posing for the camera. There is still room for improvement but mama is so happy. Tak de lah berperang sangat nak amik gambar je pun. Anyway, it's not too late to wish Salam Syawal and may this Syawal brings us thousands of bless from Allah swt. Let's check it out some of my favorite photos of my boys on the first Syawal...
Naeem memang full of expression while Abang Fahri is more chillex
Chewahhh salam salam ini pun sebab mama yang suruh
Haa macam tu la abg Fahri sporting..
Our Raya theme kali ni is baby blue actually but hubby malas nak beli baju so dia pakai baju 2 years back. Ok je..lagipun dia bukan jenis pakai baju melayu lama2. I really love my peplum! Very reasonable price dia I bought from Ashura Boutique located in AEON Shah Alam.. Memang cantik2 and affordable sangat
Macam amik gambar ngan YB plak rasanya 😉
Gambar anak beranak wajib. I love the background memang suasana kampung
Lantakla Naeem nak pose kat depan tu asalkan pandang camera
Bawah pokok kelapak
with my family in law
The only kids around as the other cucus (my SIL's children) tak balik tahun ni
Abg Fahri plak ke depan
with my lovely MIL
fefeeling anak dara jap with SILs
also with the cousins

The second Syawal, we went beraya to few relatives' houses lead by my MIL. 
See... bagus dah pandai pose hihi
Let's beraya
and menambahkan lemak
We were in Ijok, Perak till third Syawal. After Subuh on the third Syawal, we headed to Pasir Mas, Kelantan to beraya with my parents' side plak.